


Heirs of Durin: Midwinter Gifts

by Dragonsquill (dragonsquill)



Series: Heirs of Durin [2]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Ficlets, Holiday, Interviews, M/M, Shorts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-25
Updated: 2014-12-25
Packaged: 2018-03-03 10:45:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2848112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dragonsquill/pseuds/Dragonsquill
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of little "gifts" for the Midwinter Holiday in the world of <i>Heirs of Durin</i>, including ficlets, interviews, and headcanons.  There are light spoilers for the upcoming Boffins and Gimlas storylines in the interview and headcanons.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Midwinter, 12:01 a.m.

**Author's Note:**

> [Blanket Permission Statement](http://dragonsquill.tumblr.com/permission)

Once settled happily into their own home, Fíli and Kíli always woke to exchange their gifts at 12:01 Midwinter morning. 

They did this on behalf of their child selves who had, year after year, been denied the opportunity to open their gift from Santa until after the sun rose. Their parents were generally magnificent, of course, but in this one area they had been immovable (and also extremely grumpy, as if there was something wrong with being up early; many were the Midwinters at 4 a.m. when their younger selves hissed angrily to each other about how their parents were always bugging them to get up on school days but when they wanted to get up and had a good reason to get up, they were all, “Go back to bed, Fíli, and take your brother with you!”).

They didn’t have to set the alarm. Their inborn internal clocks, generally terribly out of synch (Kíli’s felt 7 a.m. was an appropriate time to go off; Fíli’s waited for 9 a.m. and fresh coffee), perfectly aligned for Midwinter, and both blue eyes and amber blinked open just after the stroke of midnight, morning of.

“Hey,” Kíli murmured, lazy and sleepy and pleased with life.

“’Morning,” Fíli returned, and then there would be a kiss that was still half lost in dreams, mumblings about morning breath from Fíli and a pinch on his hip from Kíli. 

The plan was always to exchange gifts immediately, but it never quite worked out that way. One kiss turned into two, turned into Fíli rolling on top of Kíli, turned into Kíli’s legs around Fíli’s waist, then almost lazy thrusts in counterpoint to the playful tangling of tongues, Kíli’s fingers tugging at Fíli’s hair and Fíli’s hands tucked under his shoulders as they came warm and sluggish and pleased on each other’s bellies and thighs. As a result, gifts came after sleepy kisses and half-hearted washing up (Fíli being the one who kept wipes in the bedside table), sitting up with bare laps covered by the cheerful Midwinter sheets Kíli insisted on. 

When they were children, they’d exchanged clumsy cards and hand-painted baubles for the tree. In their thirties, they’d lazily bought items and added a stripe of color to make it “handmade.” The first year they became FiliandKili and could convincingly get away with giving only one gift as a couple, Fíli presented Kíli with a pile of pillows with cases made out of old metal t-shirts for Kíli’s nesting tendencies and Kíli laughingly returned with the sketched design for their wrist tattoos and the names of two artists who would ink them at the same time. 

The year their lives would change forever, though they didn’t know it yet, Fíli gave Kíli a pair of hand-whittled drumsticks that had nearly cost him a thumb (made with long-distance direction from Bofur’s cousin Bifur), and Kíli gave him a scarf of material covered in violins, clumsily stitched under Dori’s mothering eye. 

The scarf did not properly survive Kíli’s decision to see how it would look around Fíli’s wrists, but they were fairly certain Dori would be able to help him save it. It was great fun, anyway, Fíli laughing into the pillows as it tore along the middle seam, Kíli nearly squashing him in surprise as he climaxed at the unexpected jerks and vibrations around his cock as Fíli gave in to what he would vehemently deny was a giggle fit.

Kíli’s apology for sexual near-squashing was to roll Fíli back over and suck him down, clever tongue and fingers and humming, and the sound of Fíli chuckling as he arched and came made Kíli cough his way into a laugh as well, until they were both a mess and absolutely-not-giggling.

They laughed more bare and in bed than anywhere else in their lives, and no perfectly crafted gift could ever be better than laughter and light and teasing and each other.

——

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Thank you to everyone who has commented, liked, and messaged about my stories this year. You’re wonderful people who brighten my life, and there’s no greater gift than that._


	2. Midwinter Headcanons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Have some random details about the Midwinter holiday in _Heirs_ Arda!

**Part One: Midwinter Celebration**

I don’t really have time, what with one thing and another, to properly write something for the holiday season. BUT, I thought I’d do a little headcanon round-up for Heirs of Durin and the Midwinter Festival. 

Heirs Arda has four major races: Men, who are the most numerous and control a lot of the sort of shared culture; Dwarves, who are engineers and have a lot of wealth; Hobbits, who live largely in a separated community almost like a reserve; and Elves, who are not very numerous anymore and have mostly shut themselves off from modern society.

All of these races had a midwinter festival historically. The Elves, Men, and Hobbits used this festival as a time of celebration and thanksgiving to the various Valar for a prosperous year (the Men tending to focus on the male Valar over female with particular focuses varying by country/kingdom, the Hobbits putting some special attention on the Valier, especially Yavanna and Nienna, the Elves celebrating everyone with song and feasts) . The Dwarves, who don’t have much use for Valar other than their own personal maker, celebrate Mahal on this day and to some degree Yavanna, as his wife. 

Modern traditions have all sort of muddled together and come from various cultures:

~Dwarves, as part of their celebration of Mahal, gave loved ones handmade gifts. Not piles of presents, just one gift well-made according to their craft. This is to honor Mahal’s crafting and his gift of the same to his children. Men have adopted this and made it a big shopping thing, and gone totally overboard on giving gifts to children, but dwarves have stuck to the idea of one gift per loved one, and at least partially hand-made.  
~Dwarves also contribute the idea of daily candles, bringing light into the darkness of the Halls. Candle lighting is an important dwarven ceremony that the Hobbits have picked up.  
~Hobbits loved the idea of bringing greenery into the house, which started the wreaths and trees of it all. They decorate with handmade (especially cooked or baked) items, but dwarves and men are fine with buying theirs.  
~Men have a lot of holiday-specific music that’s popular across cultures and also created, for their progeny, Santa Claus. There is disagreement among the races what race Santa belongs to.  
~Elven music is also very popular for the season, being soothing and reminding everyone of nature. But, again, they have largely removed themselves from society, so it’s older music people have heard. The Rivendell elves are the onlys ones still interacting pretty regularly with the outside world, and Elrond’s kids release albums of traditional elven music that had a big influence on Fili and Ori.  
~Men also have regional-specific traditions, such as the sleighs and carriage horses of Rohan, which are images on Midwinter cards around the world.  
~The food associated with Midwinter is probably the most mixed-up, unifying tradition in all of Arda. Desserts from the Hobbits, meat dishes from the dwarves, veggies from the elves, traditional puddings and baked goods from the men.

**Part Two: Our Personal Dorks or The Band**  
Heirs of Durin: Midwinter Headcanons Pt 2

And here we have random silly character headcanons! 

~Bilbo is fully a member of the Ur family, as far as they’re concerned, and this is out of love and not just because it means Hobbit cooking at the holidays, in case you were wondering. For more Boffins holiday stuff, look here.  
~Ori went in with Fili and Kili one year and they created an album with short pieces of instrumental music based on each family member (“family” includes “band” by the way).  
~Usually Kili cooks items to give away. He lets Fili put his name on it too if Fili measures things, but otherwise Fili is not allowed anywhere near the stove. He’s too easily distracted.  
~Nori goes in with Dori EVERY year, which means he buys the yarn and lets Dori do the knitting. Nori knows how to knit, he just doesn’t enjoy it. Dori makes him help now and again so it’s truly made by both of them. If Ori’s involved, he helps plan the designs; he’s good with numbering out knitting patterns.  
~ **The Midwinter after Heirs first album came out, Vali and Dis’s homemade gift to everyone was a copy of said album. “I made these,” Vali said, pointing at his sons on the cover. “At home,” Dis added, much to FiKi’s horror.**  
~Kili and Bilbo instituted the Heirs of Durin potluck two days after Midwinter (two days so the Baggins contingent can fly home from Ered Luin), in which band members and associated people bring all their leftovers for a big party. Tauriel provides the beverages, and that is some potent stuff.  
~Tauriel and Legolas usually have Midwinter with the dwarves because they are a bit on the outs with the elves. Leggles goes in with Gimli’s family. Tauriel like to travel to Ered Luin with the Bagginses, as fellow members of the popcorn brigade. She has a wonderful reputation for piggyback rides among the mini Bomburs  
~Vali and Dis still give their sons matching PJs every year. Dis picks the fabrics, Vali sews them. They are always horrific from the waist down and a solid, sensible color in the shirt.  
~Thorin is less grumpy on Midwinter than he is the rest of the year. He gave Fili his first violin and Kili his first guitar as Midwinter gifts, assisting with some of the design on the necks of both so it was homemade.  
~Tauriel also decorates the most badass beautiful Midwinter trees in the universe and she and Leggles hang lights like the fleet footed champs they are.  
~Gimli thinks Legolas looks handsome in candlelight, and mumbles about it.  
~Gimli also maintains that Santa is obviously a dwarf, since no other race in Arda could plan and pull off what Santa does. Legolas’s answer is, “I believe you meant Santa must be an elf,” to which Gimli ripostes, “I did not stutter, elf!” because the couple that snarks together stays together.

**Part Three: Boffins**  
This was in response to one of those "Imagine Your OTP" posts on tumblr.

**Who wraps presents horribly and has to get help from the other?**

Interestingly, Bilbo. Mostly because he doesn’t have the patience for it and gets mad and snaps at the tape dispenser for not standing still, dagnabbit, and he doesn’t have much spacial sense so he can’t cut paper the right size. Bofur’s presents, meanwhile, are a frikking work of art and it looks like he used a slide ruler and Bilbo finds it very frustrating, so mostly he’s taken to wrapping Bofur’s gifts in a plastic bag so Bofur can’t see the contents and leaving it to Bofur to do a better job.

Bofur does, however, have a tendency to do black and silver packaging that looks sufficiently metal for his personal aesthetic. He has also been known to wrap presents in band t-shirts, but that’s mostly the ones they give Kili.

**Who excitedly wakes up their partner on Christmas morning?**

Despite his wrapping fails, Bilbo loves Christmas now that he has this new family of his. He is filled to the brim with Christmas spirit. However, they are usually at Bombur’s for Christmas, which means they are wakened by a contingency of mini-Bomburs crawling all over them and complaining that Mum said we have to wait until the sun riseeees that’s not faaaair it’s morniiiiing!

**Who holds the mistletoe over the both of their heads?**

This is a contest, see, at which Bofur has an unfair advantage due to height and bulk, but Bilbo makes up some of the difference by being especially sneaky. They keep a mental tally of mistletoe attacks because they are mature adults. Loser has to clean the turkey.

**Who sets up the christmas lights and who holds the ladder?**

Bilbo is in charge of lights and Bofur holds the ladder because he is, according to Bilbo, a “solid brick in boots.” However, the first Christmas when they’re living in Dale, Tauriel helps hang the lights and starts flitting along the roof and making them both look bad.

**Who gets angry at little kids and tells them Santa isn’t real?**

Bofur would never do it because he’s angry, but he won’t lie to a kid so if a kid asks he tells the truth that Santa is a wonderful product of their imaginations, aided and abetted by their parents.

There is generally crying.

Bilbo has to issue hugs.

Bilbo would like for Bofur to stop talking to children, really.

**Who bails the other out of mall jail for telling kids Santa isn’t real?**

See above. It just happened ONCE, just a bit before the wedding, and Bilbo blackmailed Bofur into making his family dress properly for the ceremony if he bailed Bofur out.


	3. Varnish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little ficlet about nail polish. This takes place just after Fili has moved home for good from Gondor, and they have their own place for the first time.

Kíli stretched slowly down the couch, thoroughly distracting his brother with the strip of skin this move revealed at his belly, thereby allowing him to plop both (mostly clean) feet in Fíli's lap. 

Fíli's expression was singularly unimpressed, but he didn't push them off. So, score.

"Do my toes?" Kíli asked, wiggling said toes in a friendly hello. 

"Do _what_ to your toes?" Fíli eyed the digits in question with a look of suspicion more appropriate to a snake than a loving brother’s (adorable) feet.  
"Paint them." Kíli held up the small bottle of varnish, deep blue with a hidden sheen of black. "My nails are wet, so I can't do it."

"You'll look like that time you went skateboarding too much in those ridiculous shoes that didn't fit and your big toenails turned black and fell off. I seem to recall you panicking a lot about that, how you’d ‘never walk again!’ and how your feet could be used to terrify small children, and now you want to make your feet look like that on purpose?"

Kíli rolled his eyes. "These are blue, not black, and it'll look awesome in the sunlight. Stop whining and help me out.” He sneaked a breath. “What kind of boyfriend are you?"

(He only used the word boyfriend to watch the reaction he earned for it - a dancing little hint of a smile and a little dip down of his brother's proud chin that made his own stomach flutter a bit.)

"I thought," Fíli said without quite looking up, "you paid people to do this for you."

"Sure, when you were at college." Kíli shifted his foot a little, poking Fíli in the stomach with one little toe because he _could_ because Fíli was _here_ and he wouldn't be leaving again in a few days' time. "But now you're here." And, ah, that came out warmer and less teasing (and definitely a bit more desperate) than he'd intended.

Fíli reached out and took the varnish. "I'm not a professional," he warned.

"I know."

"And your feet are disgusting."

This was a lie, Kíli's feet were delightful, of course, but he still said, "I know."

"This is tantamount to torture."

"Glad to hear it," and he flexed his foot as Fíli shook the little bottle and dipped out the brush.

"You probably have some horrible fungus and it's going to infect my hands."

Kíli grinned at him. "You'll look cute with green thumbs. Maybe you'll stop killing every plant you meet."

Fíli snorted, tucked his one loose braid behind his ear, and carefully slid the brush along the nail of Kíli's right big toe.

Fíli never did anything without giving it his full attention. This was no different. The fingers of his left hand wrapped around Kíli's ankle, his fair brows furrowed, and his clever right hand moved in steady, perfect strokes. Kíli watched for the sign that - ah, there it was, a hint of tongue poking from the edge of his mouth, barely visible behind one of the swinging braids (braids Kíli wanted to touch or tuck back, but he didn’t dare; Fíli would never forgive him if he got varnish in his precious mustache).  
Fíli.

Fíli was _home_ and _here_ and just - being Fíli, teasing and smiling, touching and chuckling, putting far too much care and attention into such a mundane task. 

"Does it need more than one coat?"

"Hmm?" Kíli shook himself out of his reverie. "What?"

Fíli rolled his eyes, but his mouth was smiling. "Does it need more than one coat?"

Kíli glanced down at the hand holding his ankle. "Two, probably. But the first has to dry."

"You think you can sit still that long?"

Kíli, ever mature, stuck his tongue out. Fíli laughed, not a chuckle but a laugh, and Kíli warmed all over to hear it as his brother leaned forward to put a first coat on the other foot.

Fíli’s thigh was warm and strong under his heel, and he couldn’t quite resist the urge to rub just a tad – perhaps (definitely) hinting that maybe he could rub a little higher later. 

Fíli leveled a glare at him. “Stop _squirming_.”

“I’m not squirming,” Kíli argued, somewhat offended. “I’m flirting.”

“Well, stop flirting. Ask me to do something and then make it impossible to do. You’re such a brat.” But Fíli was happy – Kíli could tell, a lifetime of experience guiding his eyes to the hint of dimples and the quirk of lips. 

Kíli humphed but forced himself to stay still as Fíli carefully stroked on varnish and mindlessly massaged his ankle.

"I'm glad . . ." Kíli said quietly as Fíli straightened up and frowned down at his work with the same critical eye he turned on a new violin or a piece of sheet music, "I'm glad you're home."

Fíli looked over at him. The smile this time was gentle, soft at the edges and still new (because he'd left, because Kíli had to wait months to see it again, over and over for two years). He reached out, the back of his hand stroking Kíli's rough cheek. "Me too," he said quietly, and Kíli had to kiss him, wet varnish be damned.

\----

Later, Fíli insisted on fixing not only his toes but his fingers, grumbling that Kíli's shoddy work on the fingernails made his efforts "look half-assed by association." If Kíli insisted on half curling in Fíli's lap while he worked and chattering happily in his ear, well. No one was there to tease him for it.

No one except Fíli, anyway, and that was the whole point.


	4. Interviews

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The band and crew answer interview questions from tumblr users. There are slight spoilers for the Gimlas and Dwori storylines.

Heirs Interviews  
 _A couple of months ago, I took open interview questions for the Heirs band and crew on tumblr. These are the results_

**1) Fili &Kili: Is there an instrument you wish you learned or you wish you were better at (other than the two you’re obviously very good at)**

[ _Kili answers immediately as Fili watches thoughtfully_ ] The harp! I’m not much good with string instruments, percussion’s more my thing, but I could look _badass_ on the harp, is all I’m saying. I could lug one of those huge ones around, or get a little one to carry around and play whenever. But really, it’s all about the huge ones like Thorin plays.

Fili: [ _with a slow grin_ ] Thorin tried to teach you. I thought it was going to be the only time I ever saw him cry. He held it in, though, stoic to the end.

Kili: [ _shooting him a glare_ ] Shut up and answer the question!

Fili: [ _eyebrow?_ ] 

Kili: [ _rolls his eyes_ ] Yes, I KNOW, you can’t do BOTH, so just answer!

Fili: I would have liked to learn the clarinet. The one that dwarves used to carry in the mines to test depth with sound. That’s a fascinating piece of history, and so much of our folk music grew out of it as well. I know a bit with modern clarinets, but not the old ones. Bofur plays it beautifully, though.

**2) Legolas: what’s the most unusual hobby of yours that we would have never guessed?**

Legolas: [ _tilts his head to the side thoughtfully_ ] Nothing leaps to mind. I enjoy archery, but I’m an elf and used to do it to survive, so that’s no surprise. Naturally I play and sing. [ _his eyebrows lift a bit I do talk to trees, which Gimli finds disturbing and hilarious at the same time._ ]

[ _his mouth suddenly quirks into a sly little smile_ ] Of course, the fact that I left the forest caused some controversy. And now that I think about it, I did develop an odd hobby…I certainly didn’t visit the local grocery store once a day before I came to Dale. Lovely places, grocery stores. Full of food, whatnots, and cashiers.

[ _light eyes flicker in the direction of Gimli, who is sitting glaring at his interviewer and refusing to answer questions. Legolas laughs, high and tinkling and very elven_ ] 

**3) Fili &Kili: boxers of briefs? :D**

[ _They exchange a glance_ ] 

Fili: Boxer briefs

Kili: [ _slow grin_ ] 

Fili: Kili, be good. [ _he turns a charmingly apologetic smile to the interviewer, but there’ a twitch at the edge that says something else entirely_ ] Kili wears briefs. When he wears….well. [ _shrugs_ ] 

Kili: You don’t complain when it makes getting to the goods go faster. [ _he leans back in a clear and failed attempt at mimicking Fili’s slow smile and lazy near-sprawl_ ] 

Fili: You’ll get a crick in your neck if you keep sitting with your head all akimbo like that. [ _he proceeds to lean back perfectly, crossing his arms_ ] 

Kili: -_-  
 **4) Well, for the boys I would ask “How did it start?” I mean, between the two of them. Did they just know? Was that why Fili left home in the first place?**

Kili: [ _jaw tightens and he looks away, his entire body closing off_ ]

Fili: …I knew…before I left. But it wasn’t why I left. [ _watching Kili as he talks_ ] I won’t pretend I didn’t think time away might be good for us-

Kili: For _you_

Fili: For _us_. Kili didn’t know yet, and he was just over sixty. For dwarves, the age of 60 to 70 isn’t…quite adulthood, nor is it childhood. I thought if I was gone a bit…well. But the real reason I went was for music; I was already interested in learning about non-dwarven music, and Gondor was the best place to do that.

Kili: ….I didn’t know until you were gone. [ _he shifts a little closer, one hand reaching out until the sides of their hands align_ ] When did you know?

Fili: [ _looks into the distance a moment_ ] You were playing. It was over a year before I left, and Gimli was over. The two of you were playing, and you just - you were completely caught up in it, you started to play faster and wilder, until Gimli couldn’t keep up. I wouldn’t have been able to keep up. But your eyes were closed and you played it out until you slammed the symbols and opened your eyes. You were laughing. [ _flicks his gaze to Kili and smiles_ ] You were radiant.

Kili: You didn’t tell me!

Fili: You were young, and you didn’t know. [ _laces his fingers with Kili’s_ ] I knew you were worth waiting for.

Kili: …Sappy old dwarf [ _but he grins_ ]

 **5) Gimli: Would you please share what led you to your choice of instrument?**  
Gimli: [ _shifts in his seat and tugs at one of the intricate braids in his beard_ ] It was Vali, actually. Uncle Vali, though really he’s a cousin…he plays guitar. Thorin had plans that I should play some kind of horn - he gets these ideas - but i wasn’t much interested in it and Thorin had [ _lowers his voice to a murmur_ ] one of his prima donna fits don’t tell him I said that. Dad was none too pleased either, but I saw Vali at Dad’s studio a few days later. He does a lot of work there, playing backup for Dad’s acts, and I asked if he’d show me some chords. So he taught me. Vali’s a lot less uptight than Thorin. He actually gave me my first guitar. *grins*  
 **6) Crew: What’s it like wrangling the band?**

Oin: Terrible. I came out of retirement for this.

Gloin: *snorts* You _asked_ for the job, brother, and you knew you’d get it because I own their label.

Oin: *mutters* I’d probably been drinking something. I retired from a good practice, got a little bored, and ended up chasing these idiots all over the country as their required medic. Ah, well. I got to sightsee a lot.

Gloin: Early on, it was a lot of work for me. I did a lot toward building their image. Now it’s mostly crunching numbers [ _he grins_ ] and counting the cash.

Oin: [ _elbows him_ ] He busts his buttons every time Gimli comes on stage, too, don’t listen to that “it’s all about money” malarkey. 

Nori: It’s better than crawling around movie sets. And I get exclusive access to anything with the potential to explode.

Dori: They need looking after. Utterly helpless, the lot of them.

Nori: [ _shoots a sly look Dori’s way_ ] Even Dwalin?

Dori:[ _eyes narrow_ ] Especially Dwalin. Acts like a thirty year old on his first crush. [ _smirks and crosses his arms_ ] Luckily, I’m here to keep an eye on them both.

Nori: [ _snorts under his breath_ ]. Ori’s bound to notice something sometime.


	5. Ice Buckets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I was asked to do an ice bucket challenge fic - clearly, this was both for fun and, yes, I donated to the ALS foundation in honor of my great-aunt, who fought the disease for years.
> 
> This has a special, never-before-seen addition, which does reveal a bit about the Dwori storyline.

Fíli and Kíli were challenged twice in one afternoon. Once, to Thorin’s approval, was by Bard, a Man of Dale and therefore as acceptable as one could be to Thorin while committing the great sin of not being a dwarf. The second challenge was issued by _Children of Elrond,_ Arwen calmly-yet-cheekily arming the buckets she threw on her brothers, and Thorin was predictably horrified that this particular band would have the effrontery to tell dwarves (and Legolas, as it happened) that they should douse themselves in freezing water.

Thorin’s mixed feelings notwithstanding, the Disarson boys determined that if they did the challenge twice they could both (a) donate twice and (b) challenge twice as many people. 

And so they took their first dousing outdoors, with all appropriate pomp and circumstance, while they were setting up for a concert in Edoras, capitol of the Men’s city of Rohan. It was afternoon, but some concert-goers were already lining up for the performance that night, and they were thrilled when the band’s lead singers came out to chat and sign various items, and occasional people, Fíli having an especially sweeping signature for the swell of a breast.

All the coos from the women seeing their actual heights in person for the first time was something they’d gotten used to in their last few concerts in Men’s cities.

The bucket was wielded by a pleased Tauriel, who was much stronger than she looked and put in more ice than they expected. The audience cheered and shouted as the brothers’ breath caught in matching gasps (it was hotly debated on various fansites later whether or not their fierce, handsome Fíli had, indeed, made a distinct squeaking noise), and then Kíli burst out laughing while Fíli (scandalously bare arms covered in goosepimples) held him up with smirking amusement. They issued challenges to Bofur’s former bandmate Bifur, their father Vali, and their cousin Thorin Dainson, an actor from the Iron Hills. Tauriel offered to immediately refill the bucket for Legolas and hunt him down as well, which the entire line of thrilled fans cheered with deafening volume.

The second time, they chose a more…private location.

One of Kíli’s many hobbies was videography, which melded well with Fíli’s interest in photography, so that they owned a fair amount of high-quality camera equipment. They set up one such camera on the large balcony of the suite they’d booked just for the occasion (usually preferring less expensive quarters, at Gloin’s request). It was beautiful, curving out over the highrises of the capitol city, and there was enough lighting that Fíli could mess around with them until there was a warm golden glow for them to film in, with the twinkling lights of Rohan as their backdrop. 

When the video went live, it almost caused even more of a sensation than their concerts did.

\-----

Kili appeared first, stripped down this time to jeans and a tank top, more skin than he, with his appropriate dwarven sensibilities, generally showed to the public. He was holding a bucket, which was shining silver metal instead of plain plastic. Ice clacked cheerfully as he stepped into view and said, “In honor of the challenge from our elf friends in Rivendell, here is our second acceptance of the ALS ice bucket challenge – which came complete with a second donation.” He flicked a thumbs-up with his free hand. “If you’ll look down below, you’ll have a link to help you find your local chapter for donations. And this time, I’m challenging Dwalin Fundinson and the Boffins, which is to say Bofur and Bilbo, both of Heirs of Durin.

“But of course, I wasn’t challenged alone, and we wouldn’t want to do the same thing twice, so-”

The look he shot the lens was full of mischief as he motioned off-camera, and Fíli walked into frame.

Fíli, always pushing the lines of propriety after his time among Men, wore no shirt at all.

Always more quiet on camera than his brother, Fíli said nothing, only slid his gaze directly into the lens as his mouth curved into a knowing smirk. The silver bucket hung from his left hand, and he set it to swinging gently. 

“Ready?” Kíli asked, hopping a little on the balls of his feet. Both had their hair loose for once, Kíli’s curling in the autumn air into a bit of a mess around his cheeks, Fíli’s a sweeping mass hold in place only by a pair of small braids pulling it back from his eyes.

Fíli redirected his attention to Kíli and shifted his stance. One foot slid back as he adjusted the bucket into both hands. “Ready,” he answered, his voice a sweet purr of sound. 

Kíli licked his lips slowly and moved his own body into position.

Within the warm halo of light, they circled each other like wolves. 

Kili was lighter on his feet, despite his heavy Doc Martens, leaning forward as his dark eyes flickered between Fíli’s hands and his face, watching for signs of attack. Fíli was heavier, though his feet were bare, solid and gripping the stone of the granite tiles. 

Behind them, lights danced among gradations of darkness, tall buildings against the night sky, constant shifting light.

As Kíli’s eyes flickered, Fíli’s remained steady on Kíli’s face, so that every time his brother glanced at him, their eyes met and locked a moment.

Fíli’s smile was slow and full of promise. 

He had no intention of losing this game.

Kíli’s eyes widened briefly – Fíli watched as the pupils blew, and his smile took on the edge of a satisfied smirk – then narrowed as he frowned darkly. Dark brows drew down and his eyes went from laughing to fierce. 

Challenge accepted, then, with a slide of his left foot and a twitch of his wrist.

Fíli prowled and Kíli danced, their eyes locked now.

The icy water flew, finally, at exactly the same time, their knowledge of each other’s idiosyncrasies too deeply ingrained for either to pull off a surprise. Kíli took the assault directly in the face and shoulders, going absolutely rigid at the sudden intense cold, his mouth falling open with a yelp of shock. Fíli weaved, though, and took the brunt on his chest, right shoulder, and hair, his breath carefully held at the moment of impact so he wasn’t frozen in place. For a split-second he had an advantage (cold exploding across his chest, thick dark-blond curls plastered down and soaking), and he took it. Two steps and his hands were at Kíli’s waist (freezing and shivering, Kíli trying to shake off the shock because he already knew he’d let it go on too long).

Fíli pulled them together.

Kíli’s breath was little pants and icy chips clung to his shirt (soaked through, and Fíli could see the curve of the bars through both nipples in dark relief) as Fíli wrapped a possessive hand around his neck and pulled him down. His tongue flickered between them, fully visible to the camera, as he slid it between his brother’s lips, chilled and shivering, icy water falling from messy bangs down to the curve of his mouth.

Kíli groaned, low in his chest, and tangled his hands in Fíli’s hair, wet on the right side and dripping, slick around his unusually slender fingers, as he opened himself to the assault and curved into Fíli’s lead. 

The heat of Fíli’s hands (broad and rough, hard callouses along the palms and at the tips) slipping into the back of his jeans, pushing his groin forward, made Kíli growl as he sucked hard at Fíli’s bottom lip. 

Fíli tilted his head back with a grin, aimed a slow, deliberate wink at the camera – and the screen went blank.

\-----

WHAT?! WHAT WHAT?!

Where’s the rest of it?!

Oh fucking YES I want to LICK them  
\---- Pretty sure fucking is happening yes  
\--------Probably licking too  
\-----------#but you’re not invited

I think Kíli was going to eat him  
\----U CAN EAT ME ANYTIME KÍLI

Lion of Durin, yessss, look at him moooove, guh, hunting Kilis is my new hobby 

Sexuality: Fili’s Shoulders 

I WANT A PORNO OF NOTHING BUT THEM CIRCLING EACH OTHER AND FÍLI’S CHEST CURLS OKAY

Ovaries. Gone. Just. Just gone.

HELLO 999 FÍLI HAS HIS SHIRT OFF. CORONARY EVENT OCCURING. SEND HALP. 

_Can I get pregnant from watching this video?! I’m pretty sure I can get pregnant from watching his video. I’m calling the National Enquirer._

TAKE HIM OFF SCREEN AND HAVE YOUR WAY WITH HIM FÍLI YES DO IT FOR THE FANS  
\---DO IT FOR SCIENCE  
\------ DO IT FOR THE VINE  
\--------- **DO IT FOR MY LADY BITS**

\-----

“They’re going to think you threw me down in the ice and fucked me senseless,” Kíli said around the fluffy towel being scrubbed through his hair (dozens of memories from childhood, all wrapped up in Fíli’s particular brand of towel-scrubbing, with its occasional stops for scratching that made Kíli feel like a well-loved puppy).

Fíli snorted. “It’s not that it wasn’t tempting, but hypothermia isn’t the best look for you.” The towels were thick and soft, straight off the warmer in the bathroom, and Fíli had tossed one over his own shoulders. “You look handsome _in_ blue, but not _turning_ blue.” 

Kíli rolled his eyes, a look enhanced by the fact that he was, in fact, still shivering lightly. “I can handle a little cold.”

Fíli leaned forward and kissed him as he wrapped the last, dry towel around Kíli’s shoulders. It was a slow kiss, gentle and thorough, a brush of lips that deepened by degrees until Kíli was clinging to his arms and moaning against his tongue. 

“I think I’m warm enough for that whole senseless thing to happen now,” Kíli assured him – and shivered.

His brother laughed and stood, pulling him to his feet. “Maybe in bed, under the duvet,” he said, and tugged him off with a smile. “And I’ll make you some cocoa.”

“You just want me to taste like chocolate.”

Fíli’s smile became a grin, and he didn’t bother to deny it.

\----BONUS----

Bilbo and Bofur, being a couple of strength and character, accepted and completed the ice bucket challenge while standing in the middle of a small community garden Bilbo had found their second morning in Rohan. Their Hobbit was always drawn to green and growing things. Vali posted his video on Facebook, putting everyone else in the family to shame by pouring a bucket over his head while standing in another bucket as his wife tossed a bucket at his face (“That’s just showing off,” Gimli grumped, and Vali’s sons had to agree). Bifur was assisted by Bombur’s middle group of children, and their cousin Thorin sent a series of cell phone photos taken by a baby cousin who started chewing on the phone halfway through. It ended with an extremely panicked shot of Thorin’s face which Fíli, Kíli, and Gimli would cherish for all their lives. 

Dwalin, that coward, attempted to weasel out of it by donating a large sum of money.

“Donating is the entire idea,” Dori said mildly when he overheard the brothers and Gimli lament their cellist’s clear cowardice. “The ice is just a bonus.”

“He used to make me do push-ups!” Gimli argued, “In the rain!” and Kíli nodded agreement. 

“All that about building upper body strength and stamina! He was brutal! He was cruel! He once told Gimli to sit on me in the middle of one and nearly snapped my back in half.”

This earned him a dirty look from the cousin in question, which he ignored.

“I think they’re right,” came a new voice, and the group turned to see Ori watching them from the doorway. In his hands was his beloved, top-of-the-line tablet, with the best music tabulation software money could buy and a protective casing in the design of Argyle socks. 

Fíli and Kíli exchanged a look. Ori was looking especially Ori-like today, his hair a bit of a mess, his cheeks especially freckled, his skirt especially plaid, his sweater-very especially sweatery, and his grin especially awkward. If ever there was a dwarf who looked like a piano prodigy who’d been playing since diapers and never been around other children, it was this dwarf. Definitely 100% Ori.

And Dwalin, unbeknownst to Ori but certainly knownst to everyone else, nurtured a mad crush on their resident adorable dweeb.

Fíli slung an arm around Ori’s shoulder. There was a definite mischievous glint in his eye that always made Kíli’s stomach do a bit of a backflip. “So are you saying,” their professionally-minded, creative, passionate leader said, “that we should do something about that?”

Ori grinned at him, a matching glint in his own dark eyes. Fíli and Ori were a pair who didn’t seem as if they would fit together at all – one bare armed and tattooed, his dimples glittering; the other in button up and sweater-vest, with ribbons in his hair. But they did.

This time it was Gimli and Kíli who exchanged a glance. One which clearly said: _Poor Dwalin._

\---

When Dwalin’s ice bucket video went viral, the internet applauded his use of profanity while simultaneously declared him a “sweet lamb” because of the look of stunned betrayal he sent the adorable pianist when he looked up and found Ori perched on the edge of the roof, holding a bucket and waving. 

Within two hours, “Dwori” was trending on no less than three social media networks.


	6. Interviews Pt 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More Interviews. Spoilers for the Boffins storyline, which will be the next chapter posted. and a bit for Tauriel, who joins the band last.

**7) For Bofur, Bifur and Bombur — have you three considered putting the band back together and doing a show with the Heirs? What would the style be like? And how hard would Kili hyperventilate?**

[ _Bofur, Bifur, and Bombur exchange thoughtful looks_ ]

Bofur: We might do a song or three at a concert in Erebor or the Iron Hills as a sort of opener for the band, and perhaps one or two with _Heirs of Durin_. Our albums are varied - there’s always a couple of instrumentals and of course Dis’s song on each album. A few songs with _Iron Hills_ could be interesting. [ _he considers a moment_ ] I’d love a song that mixed Tauriel’s voice and Bifur’s, actually. Legolas’s voice is smooth, and even when he sings in unison with Gimli, it doesn’t have the kind of growl Bifur does.

Bifur: I’d be willing to do it. [ _He doesn’t talk much, and there’s a wild look about him, but he’s spent the last several years helping take care of young children. His hands are in leather gloves, as always._ ]

Bombur: [ _he smiles gently_ ] Maybe in the Iron Hills. I don’t like to be away from the children too long.

Bofur: As to Kili, he’d probably start squeaking and then pass out. We had a concert here once, and of course I invited Bifur and Bombur by. He was bad with Bifur but Bombur, well. He was our drummer.

Bombur: Not a patch on Kili. 

Bofur: [ _laughs_ ] Kili disagrees! He was vibrating in place and Fili was no help at all, just laughing behind his back! 

**8) Fili and Kili. What inspires you?**

Fili: Kili AND Kili: Fili

[ _they exchange a look and start laughing, Kili with his head thrown back, Fili quietly chuckling as Kili leans down enough to gently tap their foreheads briefly_ ]

Kili: Everything inspires Fili! Storm, colors, the news, passing snowflakes, butterflies-

Fili: I have never written a song about butterflies.

Kili: Yes you did. That one in college-

Fili: That was inspired by moths.

Kili: Right, right, silly me.

Fili: Kili is inspired by being hyperactive.

[ _Kili considers this before nodding in a way that implies he’s fine with this explanation._ ]

**9) Vali: Tell us of your most adorable memory from the time when Fili &Kili were little **

[ _Vali considers this question._ ]

I can only pick one? They were such rock-headed, Durin-stubborn little so-and-sos there are so many. How do you narrow it down?  
All right, here’s a favorite: Fili went through a time when he was…about ten - that’s, ah, sevenish for Men, I think - he would have bad dreams at night. We’d tuck him in, leave lights on, sing him songs - but he’d still wake up in the night and wander for a while before snuggling down in our bed. We’d wake up at least once a night and were discussing just letting him start the night in there when one morning came and no Fili. 

We rushed down to the boys’ room in full overreaction mode, and what do you think we found? Kili curled up asleep against the door all wrapped up around a plastic sword.

When we woke him up enough to get actual words out of him - this took several minutes - he finally grinned at us and said, “I kept the bad dreams away with my sword!” and whacked the door with it. 

He slept with that sword for about three months, and by the time he’d decided to switch over to a stuffed rabbit, Fili’s nightmares were gone.

**10) Fili &Kili: a book or a film that has made you cry?**

Kili: I sniffle along and get teary eyed in all the appropriate places in movies. I’m a sucker, I admit. Fili carries tissues for me. It’s romantic. [ _he grins_ ]

Fili: I don’t cry at movies.

Kili: Not unless-

Fili: [ _warning tone_ ] Kili-

Kili: [ _cheerfully_ ] - it’s _The Land Before Time._

Fili: we don’t talk about that movie

Kili: When Littlefoot’s mother dies

Fili: Kili!

Kili: - he cries every time. I talked him into rewatching it after he move home - where he should have been all along [ _Fili rolls his eyes_ ] and he cried again, all in his mustache, just like the old days.

**11) Fili &Kili: favourite cooking/baking recipe?**

Fili: I don’t cook.

Kili: Thank goodness.

Fili: Right

Kili: Fili has an obnoxious number of skill, but cooking isn’t one of them. But *I* love cooking steaks! Properly! Over flames!

Fili: [ _snorts_ ]

Kili: [ _eyeball_ ] Because it gets the best flavor.

Fili: And the best chance for you to play with fire.

Kili: grins and doesn’t argue] They have to be seasoned just right, and cooked exactly - it’s a great challenge. Simple, but hard to perfect.

Fili: Kili’s a great cook. He started with a couple of classes and just went from there. He makes these slow-roasted babyback ribs to KILL for. He rubs white wine and…ah…other stuff on them. Or…cooks it in it or —- well, anyway. 98% of what he cooks is delicious.

**12) Vali: favorite book?**

[ _Grins, and it’s obvious where his boys get it from_ ]

_Up From Stone: The History of the Royal Family of Erebor._ I checked it out from the library when I was a kid and it had loads of pictures in it - including one of the little girl-who-would-be-princess. She was the cutest girl I’d ever seen and I developed an instant crush on her. I begged my parents for a copy on my birthday. They were so proud I was interested in history. 

[ _He hops up and goes to fetch the book. It’s in excellent condition, but shows some limited evidence of its great age. When he sets it down it flips straight to the picture of a “teenage” dwarf female, dark hair and light eyes, looking solemnly into the camera. She is in the picture with two males, and underneath it reads THORIN, FRERIN, AND DIS, CHILDREN OF THRAIN, THE LAST PRINCES AND PRINCESS OF EREBOR._ ]

In my defense, I did read the whole thing, and the history is fascinating too. 0_~

**13) Tauriel &Legolas: have you ever lifted any of the dwarves, when they couldn’t reach something they wanted? (truth now!)**

Tauriel: [ _laughs musically_ ] Ori doesn’t mind if you do this, really, so I’ve helped him more than once. But really, we live in Dale and work in Dale and Erebor. Everything in Dale is designed on two scales, and everything in Erebor on theirs - we’re usually the ones crouching. 

Legolas: [ _flashes a little grin_ ] It was a bit different on the road, though.

Tauriel: That’s true. Everything was out of reach for them in Rohan, as I recall. I thought Dwalin would have a fit. But mostly, they’d just glare daggers at something out of reach until we grabbed it-

Legolas: That’d be Dwalin and Thorin

Tauriel: or pretended they didn’t need it in the first place

Legolas: Bofur and Fili

Tauriel: Or mounted a climbing expedition

Legolas: Kili

Tauriel: Though I have my suspicions about times Gimli might be lifted for…reasons pertaining to..personal exercise.

Legolas: TAURIEL!

Tauriel: [ _offers the most charming and innocent of smiles_ ]

**Author's Note:**

> [Blanket Permission Statement](http://dragonsquill.tumblr.com/permission)


End file.
